14th Sunday after Pentecost

The theme of today’s gospel reading, and my focus today, is forgiveness. I’m going to tell two true stories that are extreme cases of forgiveness, which I hope will stretch the limits of what kind of forgiveness you think is even possible.

The first is told in Valerie Kaur’s book See No Stranger: A Memoir and Manifesto of Revolutionary Love. On August 5, 2012, a white supremacist opened fire at the Sikh Temple of Wisconsin in Oak Creek, killing six people initially and fatally wounding a seventh who died years later. Satwant Singh Kaleka, the gurdwara's president and father of Pardeep Singh Kaleka, was among those murdered. Despite his grief and anger over his father’s murder, Pardeep Singh Kaleka wanted to understand why a white supremacist would want to kill his father. The killer had turned the gun on himself, so Pardeep instead reached out to Arno Michaelis, who was a former white power neo-Nazi skinhead who had helped found the group that his father’s killer belonged to. Pardeep and Arno agreed to meet at a Thai restaurant in Milwaukee a few days later. Pardeep’s mom pleaded with him not to go. Michaelis had spent a good decade attacking anyone who wasn’t white or straight. But Michaelis had since renounced the white power movement and committed to helping others abandon far- right extremism. And Pardeep needed to have this conversation to heal. So they met, and ended up talking for hours. The two forged a powerful bond of reconciliation, choosing compassion over inherited hatred. The two traveled together to share messages of forgiveness, healing, and the rejection of white supremacy. They launched the Milwaukee-based nonprofit organization Serve2Unite to foster peace, mentor young people and counter violent extremism among youth, build inclusive communities, and dismantle extremist ideologies. Although they don’t see exactly eye to eye on how to counter racism, they do consider each other genuinely good friends, and they both do try to see humanity in everyone. Wow. I wonder, would you have had the courage to reach out to someone who helped found the hate group from which the murderer came who killed your father, and to go meet in person? Would you have had the courage to go meet someone whose father was killed by a man you had helped radicalize? What courage, and what forgiveness.

The second story comes in Kathleen McGowan’s book, The Source of Miracles: 7 Steps to Transforming Your Life Through the Lord’s Prayer. In her chapter on forgiveness, she writes, “Amy Biehl was a brilliant, compassionate, socially conscious student at Stanford University, and a Fulbright scholar. In 1992 she relocated to Cape Town, South Africa, to work in the communities that had been decimated by apartheid, the institutionalized racism that had plagued South Africa and resulted in reprehensible discrimination and subsequent violence since 1948. Amy worked with the underprivileged in the black townships, and in preparation for the first ‘free elections’ that would allow blacks to vote, she labored to promote voter registration there. Everyone who worked with Amy spoke of her passion to improve the conditions in South Africa and her dedication to promote tolerance, equality, and education across racial lines.

“On August 25, 1993, after a day of working to register black voters, Amy drove through the township of Gugulethu outside Cape Town. She was in the wrong place at the wrong time. An angry demonstration over racial discrimination was just breaking up, and a gang of young men, spotting Amy in her car, decided to make an example of her. The men were black, Amy was white. This was the only factor they took into account in a terrible instant of rage. The men had no way of knowing that Amy was an ally, a crusader for change and equality. At that moment, she was a symbol to them of what had oppressed their people in South Africa for so long, an emblem of a horrific racial divide. The men stoned Amy’s car to force her to stop, then dragged her out of the car and into the mob. “What happened next is almost too nightmarish to repeat. Amy was murdered at the hands of the mob: stoned, beaten with bricks, and then ultimately stabbed to death. The promising light of Amy Biehl was extinguished at the age of twenty-six. “Four of Amy’s killers were tried for murder and subsequently sentenced to eighteen years in prison. But amnesty opportunities came to them through South Africa’s Truth and Reconciliation Commission, an investigative body formed by Nelson Mandela to investigate crimes that occurred during the heated tensions of apartheid. “Amy’s parents, Linda and Peter Biehl, attended the amnesty hearing for Amy’s killers in 1998. While in attendance they did something completely unexpected: the Biehls expressed their forgiveness and asked the judge to pardon the men who had murdered their daughter. They pleaded for their amnesty with grace and eloquence, emphasizing the need for dialogue to replace violence. And when that amnesty was granted, the Biehls shook hands with the young men who had taken the life of their child. The men responsible for Amy’s death were released after serving four years in prison.”

What a jaw dropping, tear-jerking story of unfathomable forgiveness. What an amazing bar of forgiveness for the rest of us to consider. By the way, Linda and Peter created the Amy Biehl Foundation to continue their daughter’s work, supporting the well-being of the township in which Amy was murdered through youth programs, discussion groups, and community projects to create jobs. The families were healed, the community restored, and the energy of forgiving and loving thy neighbor radiated beyond that community, throughout South Africa and the world. What a beautiful legacy to come out of such tragedy. Perhaps you are inspired to test this complete, unconditional approach to forgiveness in your own life. I hope so. But perhaps you simply cannot understand this level of forgiveness. In this case, McGowan wisely emphasizes, by learning from these extreme examples, you will never have to repeat them. Amy Biehl’s legacy is a gift of an important spiritual lesson, through a dramatic example. There’s an example of seventy-seven times, or even seventy-times seven. That’s something to be grateful for! She then encourages us, and I also encourage us, to think about that story, and consider whether we might be capable of forgiveness in such extreme circumstances. I also encourage us, as she does, to consider who we currently are holding grudges against, and why. Then, ask yourself if you can forgive them for their human failings. If you are having a hard time, she has a suggestion, to remember this important affirmation: people are doing the best they can with what they have. Maybe someone was just told their son won’t make it to his second birthday. Maybe someone just found out they have cancer. Maybe someone’s spouse just told them they want a divorce.

We have no idea what others are going through, or why they might do something to hurt us. It doesn’t excuse their behavior. But it can help us find forgiveness and compassion. May we be inspired by Amy’s parents’ example of forgiveness in unimaginable circumstances. May we be inspired by the unlikely friendship and reconciliation of Pardeep Singh Kaleka and Arno Michaelis. May God continue to push us to practice wanton, limitless, reckless forgiveness, to push the boundaries of what kind of forgiveness is possible, that your kin-dom come, your will be done, here on earth as in heaven. Amen.